.five in the morning.

Good news children.
Celebrate for one more year.
And a year after that.
Will every year be the last?
(another chance to be in the
mermaid parade)
Hooray!

.your boy's smile.

Dear F Train:

everyone hates you.
everyone.

people who have lived here
for weeks
or
for decades.

i failed you on your report card.
and i enjoyed every moment of it.

i hate you so much.
(yet i need you everyday)
fuck you.

-me

.have done it with you.

has anyone
noticed
that
Andy Samberg
can do or say whatever he wants
now.

i think most of his stuff is
pretty funny.

but he seems so
fucking smug.

i think i would
punch him in the face
if i ever saw him eating on the street.

no hard feelings or anything.
i just would.
just...cause.

.but i'd rather.

or subtitled: why gossip girl is the best new york show, ever.

- The only areas in manhattan are apparently Upper East Side and "downtown"

- The completely non-sense reasoning behind the character's actions (dad's gay so I'm a bitch)

- The "poor" family lives in "brooklynville"

- But they live (I think) above the gallery the dad owns called Bedford Avenue Gallery

- Dad says he's sorry for his lack of money but the cost of living in that area and owning an amazing loft apartment is much more than the private school education that he's providing for his two teens

- Though with their weird timeline he would have been like 15 when he had the eldest teen

- The fact that the gothamist covers it with each episode.

- The fact that the Gothamist exposed that the bitchy girl's party was actually shot in LIC (Long Island City, Queens). Like, ewwww, Queens.

- Lonely boy Dan looks my age (and imdb check says....yes! he's only a year younger than myself)

- Suicidal brother is the only one who looks the correct age (and imdb check says...yes! he's actually 17)

- Suicidal brother is in a rehab center that always someone to easily sneak him and take him to marquee (non-ny-ers: infamously obnoxious club that has standards of entry beyond comprehension - it is also mentioned in ugly betty for being the scene of a car crash involving a donatella versace-esq woman or the worst place to take anyone straight out of rehab, the lindasy lohan effect)

- There are "uniforms" at this private school they go to which translate into any sort of variation of trendy woman/mens wear. Example: Serena wears knee high riding boots, grey shorts, a white tank top, a sort of flimsy vest and a loose tie while others may wear a gwen stefani version of japanese school girl.

- The "bitchy" girl's "best friends" are an asian and a black girl that never say a word and dress exactly how you would stereotype them...it's amazingly archaic

- The new girl, the one whose dad says "brooklynville" is the girl from How the Grinch Stole Christmas. Classic.

- Two of the characters are forced to stay into a relationship because their families have companies that might do business with each other and they want to keep it that way. Fabulous.

- The bitchy girl is a virgin if I remember correctly. A slutty, slutty virgin.

- There are no homosexuals in the Upper East Side - except for the bitchy girl's father, who left.

- Everyone drinks (underage drinks) but no one smokes. Thank you new government standards. Teach the kids that cigarettes are so not cool but drinking and flirting with 30 year old strangers is perfectly acceptable television (oh, this drinking never makes anyone sick or, so far, has any consequences except for making people, like, so much more fun)

- A fun casual shopping trip includes a stop at Bergdorf Goodman. Where you can buy this ridiculously priced outfit. I know this is perfectly acceptable for rich UESers, but I still don't have to like. Show me some smoking!

- And last but not least, the complete lacking of acting skills by all the actors and the fact that I would never ever want that to change.

.a tall building.

i'm awake
after a day when the only thing i could
think about it
was going to bed.
early.

they're filming a movie
right outside my window.

it's a new years scene
so now they're making
snow
and it's
70 degrees
right now.
it keeps melting.
so they keep making it.

it's so bright.
and no one
can sleep.

so we're all sitting in our windows.
tired.
watching the filming.

so tired.
but so fascinating.

.off the top of.

despite all my
complainings
and
negative observations

this is the cutest, most clever commercial i've ever seen.

it is so well designed.

and these (and this) posters are pretty amazing as well.

.threw my bad fortune.

when i come home from work.
i get off at west 4th on the C/E.
and i
walk down
to catch the
F.
every step down
the heat overwhelms me more.

like i'm going to the
5th circle of hell.
swamp.
but with no water.
and Hermes isn't waiting for me.
just the F train.
with it's cranky conductors.
who say things like:
"this is delancy street on the brooklyn bound F train, next stop is...next stop is...next stop is I don't know"

(if i only made these things up)

(flip record to side 1B)

i left for work.
got in the elevator with a girl.
walked out,
it was
freezy
went to the ATM
came back
and waiting for the elevator
was the same girl.
"you forget something too?"

it was just a
moment
i liked.

.lights.

New Yorkers want you
to feel like
your in an
exclusive club
with rules and ways of doing things
but in reality
it's an overpriced membership to the YMCA

.the bright.

Glad someone else wrote about this
because
I thought I was crazy
for thinking the
same.

Week in Review
Curbside, We’ll Never Have Paris
By FRANK BRUNI
Published: September 30, 2007
New York cafes, where the elbows on your table aren’t
necessarily yours