(in all seriousness)

Walking to work I was a little cranky because I really wanted to stay in bed but I was really thrown off because someone did the bike-ass-grab on me on the way to work. A lot of people at work ride bikes and I totally thought it was someone at work messing with me when I realized that um, I don't know this person.

So, seriously, as a heads up. Guy on crappy bike, riding around West Chelsea. 35-40 year old black guy with a big puffy jacket and black, beat up beenie. Has bags under his eyes. Snap a pic if you can.

Luckily, I've made friends with the construction workers next to my building and have them ready to attack if they see him again.